Separation Anxiety 101: Handling First-Day Jitters Like a Pro
Hi friends!
The school year is approaching and the big day is here—your little one’s first day of preschool! You’ve picked an outfit, taken the “first day” photo (tag us! #HelloMelbournePreschool 😉), and are ready to send them off with a smile. But then… the lip quivers, the clinging begins, and suddenly, you’re both questioning everything.
Don’t worry—you’re not alone! Separation anxiety is totally normal for preschoolers (and let’s be honest, for parents too!). The good news? Below we have 6 tried-and-true strategies to help ease the transition.
1. Keep Goodbyes Short and Sweet
Lingering at drop-off = extra tears. Give a quick hug, a confident “I love you! Have a great day!” and head out. The longer you stay, the harder it gets for your child, and for you. Another great tip our Director Miss Odalis will always suggest is fake it til you make it! If you are exuding confidence and calm- so will your child. Kids are like tiny emotional sponges. If they sense you’re anxious, they’ll feel it too! Keep your tone upbeat, your body language confident, and save the ugly crying for the front desk- we’re here to support you with hugs and tissues!
On the first day, when a parent shows fear, panic, or even cries during drop off - all these signals from the parent provoke fear in the child- it’s only a natural human reaction to follow our parent’s lead. So if you’re confident- even if you’re faking it- they will soak it up and feel confident too. And not to worry- even if your little one is still feeling unsure- research has shown that children often stop crying within a few minutes of a parent leaving.
2. Create a “See-You-Soon” Ritual
A secret handshake? A goodbye rhyme? A high-five-hug-spin combo? A predictable farewell routine gives kids a sense of control and comfort. Find something fun that says, “This is our special way to say goodbye, and I’ll be back soon!”
3. Pack a Comfort Item
We allow each student to bring in a favorite stuffed animal to school each day. Offer for your child to pick which stuffed animal to bring- it can give a little emotional boost throughout the day!
5. Talk It Out!
In the days leading up to the first day, chat about preschool like it’s the coolest place ever. “You get to play! Make new friends! Have snack time!” Kids thrive on familiarity, so drive by the school, meet the teachers, or read books about first-day adventures. We encourage parents to bring their children with them when they take a tour if possible- that way your child is already familiar with our environment!
6. Trust the Teachers
Preschool teachers are separation anxiety magicians. They know how to redirect, engage, and comfort your child. A fun fact: Most kids adjust way faster than parents expect! And sometimes- our kiddos adjust even faster than we do!
The first day of preschool is a huge milestone—for both of you. There may be tears (theirs, yours, or both), but sooner than you think, your child will be running into class without looking back! And you? You’ll be the proud parent of a confident, independent little learner who is ready to grow and explore!
See you in the classroom!
Toodleoo!
Academic Sources:
Balaban, N. (2006). Easing the Separation Process for Infants, Toddlers, and Families. ERIC Digest.
Bridges, L. (2020). Transitions to Early Care and Education: Theories and Practices that Support Children and Families. Routledge.